Speed reporting

You could say we live in the Jokey era, where even serious topics are looked at slant, with irony or derision or tongue-in-cheek.

Many times it's to compensate for a lack of understanding or knowledge--if it turns out what you write or say misses the point and/or is wrong/stupid/offensive, you can always hide behind the 'I was just kidding' defense and then employ the 'anyway chill out' strikeback.

It also feeds into our natural inclination to divide the world into us and them, snickering at their odd food/culture/customs, except when we erupt with indignation when we're being laughed at.

Why does it have to be that way? Why not just do your best to get it--talk to people in the know, do some reading, ask lots of questions? It's not that hard, it won't take that much time, and at the end of the day you get to trade that slick feeling of hipness in for genuine fulfillment.

And when you do chuckle, it's not out of ignorance but rather shared mirth.

As always, the Times provides fodder. In this case, Neil MacFarquhar, in his It’s Muslim Boy Meets Girl, but Don’t Call It Dating article.

So here’s the thing about speed dating for Muslims.

Many American Muslims — or at least those bent on maintaining certain conservative traditions — equate anything labeled “dating” with hellfire, no matter how short a time is involved. Hence the wildly popular speed dating sessions at the largest annual Muslim conference in North America were given an entirely more respectable label. They were called the “matrimonial banquet.”

“If we called it speed dating, it will end up with real dating,” said Shamshad Hussain, one of the organizers, grimacing.

Both the banquet earlier this month and various related seminars underscored the difficulty that some American Muslim families face in grappling with an issue on which many prefer not to assimilate. One seminar, called “Dating,” promised attendees helpful hints for “Muslim families struggling to save their children from it.”

I wanted to like the article--it's great to see a piece about Muslims with nary a mention of terrorists. How great would it be if we could all sit back and laugh because we love, poking gentle fun at foibles that ultimately cut across all religious and ethnic lines.

But Neil's overly-familiar style and word choice and general tone fall more into the let's all sit back and laugh at the unwitting foreignness of Muslims, befuddled by trying to adhere to a 7th century religion in modern America. Even the photo choice left me flat.

Yo, Neil--satire depends on two things that are entirely missing in post-9/11 America when it comes to Islam: common knowledge, and good intentions. Journalists don't have the luxury of working in a vacuum.

Photo of Fatima Alim, who "has strong views about the kind of woman her son Suehaib, 26, should marry," by James Estrin.